How To Balance Expectations In A Relationship

Sibasish Singha- Jul 17, 2024

We demand closure as though our lives were put together as neatly as novels, but the fact of the matter is they’re not. In real life, relationships are messy and poorly written, ending too early or too late, and sometimes in the middle of a sentence. -Beau Taplin

All kinds of relationships come with some form of expectation, be it family, friendship, or a mutual relationship of any kind. When it comes to a romantic relationship with your partner, this truth remains still. Love, trust, courage, transparency, and care projected towards our partners are the staples to staying happy and healthy together. But you know, we shed little to no light on the role played by expectations in a relationship. So, let’s have a look at how your expectations can make or mar your relationship. especially when considering dating vs marriage and how each phase uniquely influences our needs and perspectives.

Sexpectations

It goes without saying that this hould be a regular discussion between your partner and you. And believe it or not, a strong sense of emotional love alone is not enough to sustain a relationship for many folks. The lack of mutual satisfaction or basic intimacy may slowly erode your romantic bonds. You must realize that transparency, courage, trust, and all that apply to desires as well. So, it is actually healthy to talk about dry spells when the two of you haven’t engaged in the act. Engage in a healthy dialogue with your partner about satisfaction, self-care products, likes, dislikes, triggers, and sexual desires in a shame-free manner.

Money Measures

Money and budgeting are a big issue for many couples, even if there is enough of it to go around. Expectations placed on money when faced with dejection can often result in unrest of some kind. This is especially true for couples who live together. Talk with each other regarding the monetary discretions that you expect of one another, be it spending, saving, or perhaps expensive gifts for that matter. The “things will work out for the best” approach is not applicable when you are on a joint venture, because it is a commitment, much like any other promise that you make to your partner.

A Symphony Of Interests

Quite a lot of people enter a relationship with the beliefs that put their partner on the pedestal of “everything”. I mean, we all go into a relationship with some expectations and adorations because love is an over-the-top emotion. But it is desperately important to understand that love is a two-way street. Just as you have expectations, your partner must do, too, more so if you are in an age-gap relationship.

You can create fireworks if most of your interests intersect, but even if they don’t, acceptance of their interests and desires is the key. You love them for who they are and what they are. So, keep your heads out of the clouds because there is beauty in compromise when it comes to love. And, once in a while, the two of you can have a date night to serve each others’ interests and keep things dynamic.

The Picture Is A Jigsaw

Living life is all about individuality. Comparisons were never ideal, nor were they fun; as kids, teens or adults. Every couple is unique too, you are two of a kind. Never set your standards to achieve the sense of an ideal couple, because being the best together is an organic process. Let each other breathe, learn, love, reject, and replace anything. Not everything can fit into the curves between you, and very few will actually do. So yeah, give each other a chance without any premonitions, because you might not know what you will miss if you build a plan that isn’t you.

Big Things Come In Small Packages

The beginning of a relationship is filled with new love highs. Everything is on extremes, and there is joy in everything. The little things like a quiet walk for a date night, to the grandiose gesture of a flowery bed at the end of a well-planned dinner, are given individual merit. That is how a relationship should be. The expectations in a relationship should never outweigh the little victories and moments you have together. Realize the joy in the little things you build together because every inch of your partner’s being, body, or otherwise is a treat to cherish.

And if expectations and communications become overbearing sometimes, mellow each other down with The Couple’s Play Book. For the other moments, there is plenty more to do, as long as you have each other; personality, body, emotions, and all that they offer.