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Musings

Fighting as a Couple 101: How to Fight Fair & Grow Together

Team MyMuse - Jul 25, 2024

In healthy relationships, fighting, for a couple, is a catalyst for positive change and personal growth. Let's dive into the psychology behind fighting better together.


First things first, fights are totally normal for all kinds of couples. Yep, even the ones who finish each other's sentences and look like they’ve just stepped out of a rom-com! In healthy relationships, fighting, for a couple, is a catalyst for positive change and personal growth. Let's dive into the psychology behind fighting better and discover how to strengthen your bond through healthy arguments, doesn’t matter whether you are in a
live-in relationship or not.

James Dean Breaking Up GIF by The Room

Set Boundaries and Stay Open-Minded

Agree on healthy boundaries before any disagreements arise. Think of it as setting the ground rules for a fair fight—like a boxing match but without the gloves and bruises. It’s important to discuss what’s off-limits (no name-calling, for instance) and ensure that even while fighting, you as a couple, feel comfortable expressing their feelings.

Stay open-minded, even when emotions run high. When things get heated, it's easy to cling to your perspective like a life raft. But being open to your partner’s point of view can turn the tide. Take a deep breath, count to ten, and remind yourself that there is more to your relationship than this fight. 

Listen Up

Hear your partner out, ask questions, and truly understand their perspective. Put down your phone, make eye contact, and really listen. Nod along, paraphrase what they’ve said, and ask questions to dig deeper. This shows that you value their viewpoint and are willing to work towards a solution together. Practice reflective listening by summarizing what your partner just said and checking if you got it right. It might feel a bit formal at first, but it really works. 

A man giving love advice

Love > Arguments! 

Remember, you're on the same team like any other fighting couple! In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to forget that you and your partner are not adversaries but allies. Always assume the best in each other. When things get too intense, take a breather. A short break can give you both time to cool down and gather your thoughts. And who knows you might end up finding a naughty way of making up with the best lubricant gel & oils and Groove wand massager.

Uncover Triggers & Embrace Opportunities 

Identify the root of repetitive arguments. Often, fights are just symptoms of deeper issues. By addressing the underlying problems, you can prevent future conflicts. Each disagreement is an opportunity to learn more about yourself and your partner. It’s like a crash course in ‘How to Love Better.’ Embrace these moments of tension as stepping stones to a stronger, more resilient relationship.

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