The Keys to Successful Self-Pleasure

How and why it’s good to feel good….even in a pandemic.

Did you know that May is also known as #MasturbationMonth? A time when the sexual wellness community and people around the world celebrate the joys of self-pleasure, advocating for this natural (and fantabulous) part of human existence. Not to disregard the pains of the pandemic in any way, but this couldn’t have come at a better time. Since we’re all basically confined to our homes yet again, there’s not much left to do other than cook, clean, work and try to stay sane.

We’ve already been through the roundup of 2020 lockdown trends– taking an online course, baking banana bread, those zoom quiz nights. This year’s lockdown somehow feels more quiet, more personal, more inward-looking. But there’s still ways to make this time of self-exploration a whole lot more, ahem, exciting.



Feel Good, Not Guilty

Masturbation feels good. Period. We all do it, and we’d be lying if we said we didn’t. But for many, it’s still an act shrouded in guilt. Why should we feel guilty for making ourselves feel good, for finding moments of pleasure and release in an otherwise stressful time?

Mentally and physically, the benefits of masturbation are well-documented. And given the current circumstances it’s also the safest sex option out there. There’s no better time than now to scrap the notion of a “guilty pleasure” because newsflash: there’s no such thing. Find your moments of self-pleasure where you can, and enjoy the heck out of ‘em – whether it’s a bubble bath, a Netflix binge or a good old wank.

 

Get Out of your Rub-Down Rut

Masturbation can sometimes feel like another task on an endless to-do list. Our busy lifestyles have made many of us fans of getting the most efficient “result” in record time. Not to mention the lack of privacy that sometimes doesn’t leave us with a choice but to crank one out without much variation. In a bid to relieve stress as fast as we can, we often relegate self-pleasure to a hurried, goal-oriented and biological outcome… which takes all the fun out of it, tbh

Why take something that’s meant to be enjoyed, and expedite it like a double-tap instant gratification reflex?


With more time on our hands, let’s try to experience new forms of self-pleasure by unlocking and exploring different ways of riding our favourite bicycle. Here are some ideas on how:


Mindful Masturbation

We’ve all heard the woo-woo crowd talk about the benefits of meditation. So why not introduce self-love to the mix? “Mindfulness incorporated with self-pleasure and exploration can help people become more in touch with their bodies in a non-judgmental way, and give them a space to experience physical and emotional pleasure in a time when fear is the predominant feeling,” says Madeline Cooper, a psychotherapist who specialises in sexual health.

Some practice it by focusing on pleasurable thoughts while meditating and deep breathing, while some indulge in experimenting with varied levels of pressures, memories, movements, and sounds (basically anything that turns you on) during the act of masturbation. The only “rule” is to submit to one's body and its desires. Take your time, and make the act of masturbation a long, meandering road trip, rather than a hurried pit-stop.

 

Erotic Exploration: Shake it up to shake it off

We can all agree that it’s fun to mix things up and experiment with new positions with a partner. Sexploration doesn’t need to stop when we’re flying solo, because just as we evolve with our partners, we also evolve as sexual beings by ourselves. Switching up our masturbation skills can help us expand on our own ideas of pleasure. And there’s a myriad of masturbation practices to choose from:

Reading or writing erotica, clicking aesthetic and artistic nudes, upping your sex-tech game with a fun new toy, trying some solo anal play, exploring other erogenous zones, or simply trying a new position/ technique from your usual go-to. Even if you’ve got a partner, masturbating along with them or simply masturbating while they watch can be a complete game-changer.


Finishing Thoughts

The keys to unlocking a whole new world of self-pleasure are pretty simple, and readily available to all of us, right from the comfort of our homes. 

It starts with accepting yourself and your desires, giving yourself time and space to explore them, and trying new things with an open mind (and body).


If the on-going pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that life is short– so find moments of joy where you can, and hold on to them tight. And if anyone tells you otherwise, maybe suggest they go blow off some steam with a solo sesh :) 


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While our contributors do research a great deal to give you up to date and relevant content, this is basis publicly available information. Our contributors are not doctors or healthcare service providers and our content does not constitute or act as a substitute for medical advice or diagnosis under applicable laws. All suggestions, advice, points of view etc., are meant for adults in the privacy of their own homes.



**This article was written by one of our talented guest contibutors, Nazma Kazani. Born in Bombay and blossomed in the UK and Jordan, Nazma is a producer, journalist and scrambled eggs extraordinaire who creates content that promotes the diversity of human experience. 

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While our contributors do research a great deal to give you up to date and relevant content, this is basis publicly available information. Our contributors are not doctors or healthcare service providers and our content does not constitute or act as a substitute for medical advice or diagnosis under applicable laws. All suggestions, advice, points of view etc., are meant for adults in the privacy of their own homes.

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