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If you're screaming in agony every time you get down and dirty and have no clue why or how to fix it, don't stress! We've got all the info you need to work your way out of it!
Sex can be a real pain in the...you know where. It's not always as steamy and sensual as those pesky porn videos make it seem. Wondering what could be a sign of or cause of painful sex?
There could be n number of reasons why penetrative sex can turn into a painful experience. However, two of the major reasons are vaginal dryness and any personal shame that one might associate with sex. So, if you feel vaginal pain during sex, consider the option that you may not be completely aroused for the act itself which can be also accredited to shame sometimes. But if that isn’t an issue for you, then vaginal dryness is the criminal to shoot after. Fortunately, there are very doable solutions that can help tackle these issues.
Dealing With Vaginal Dryness
When it comes to dealing with vaginal dryness as a reason for painful sex, there is no better remedy than lube. Often long drawn-out sessions of intercourse or even multiple sessions for that matter can lead to a lack of natural lubrication. While this is absolutely natural, giving into your libido and pushing through to experience potentially painful sex is an absolute no-no.
Trust us, your intercourse sessions are guaranteed to always end in happy endings should you get yourself a water-based lubricant like Glide jelly. I mean, regardless of how wet you are, there is nothing wrong with upping the ante even more right?
The Less Accredited Clitoris
Before delving into dealing with ‘shame’ with respect to sex, it is important to address sex from the perspective of female pleasure. One might readily agree that the idea of orgasm is regarded as the nirvana of intercourse. But, it is very important to note that vaginal penetration doesn’t always bring attention to the clitoris, which is the ground zero of female orgasm and pleasure. In fact, many women have their G-spot location clitorally based and more often than not, does in fact lie deeper than just the small nub that you might otherwise see on the outside of the vulva.
Pro Tip: Being fully aroused means that you are absolutely wet, have your clitoris engorged, and your vagina is prepared for penetration. So, engaging the clitoris might just be the missing key that unlocks your doors to painless sex.
Dealing With Shame
Dealing with personal shame, on the other hand, is quite tricky. Being fully aroused is very important; no half-measures can be risked which means curbing away shame is the key to it all.
Go Deeper
By this, we are not asking you to go deeper in your love cave. But you must go deeper in your search for the cause since it could be something that requires medical attention. It is always a good idea to talk to your gynaecologist and find a medically approved solution.
Massagers Are Your Best Friend
This is no rocket science that sexuality and the taboo around pleasure products are bridged by shame. But what exactly is the shame that we are talking about here? To be clear, it is usually when an individual identifies themselves as the problem or mistake for sex being less pleasurable for their partner or themselves. And when these feelings internalise, they can make a woman feel less adequate about herself.
This very feeling of inadequacy can be associated with the usage of massagers too as many women see it as a self inability to achieve orgasm without aid and thus find it shameful. This feeling of difficulty to achieve an orgasm and the need to use a massager to achieve one can make a woman feel very broken. And as stated already, penetrative sex isn’t the only way for women to orgasm, thus holding such expectations of oneself is an unhealthy standard to hold up when it involves sexual wellness.
So, to embrace sexuality, relieve sexual shame and have better sex, one needs to warmly welcome massagers into their sex life. You can always start with something simple like the Pulse full body massager and slowly work your way up to something more aggressive and kinky.
All that said, you must remember that massagers aren’t there to fix anything within you since you aren’t broken at all. They are just meant to bridge the gap between your orgasms and pleasure points. After all, the least one can ask of sex is for it to be pleasurable unless pain is where you drive pleasure from, but that is a chapter for another day.
Pro tip: If the feeling of deep pain during sex persists even when you have an addition of massagers, lubes and the whole works, then perhaps it is time you consult a doctor for advice. They should be able to help identify your problems better and suggest more accurate treatments on how to avoid painful sex.
Also Read: How To Try Outercourse If You're Not Ready For Penetration
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