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Why is the urge for breakup sex so strong? What makes us lose all sense of logic and give in to sex with the ex? Is it just love, or something far more logical?
Okay, I can’t deny that breakup sex is possibly as tempting to me as the apple was to Eve. But why does everyone seem to think it’s such a bad idea? Dua Lipa even wrote, ‘If you’re under him, you ain’t getting over him’. And I’m sure everyone considering sex with the ex knows that this is going to make the ‘getting over them’ period longer. We all know it’s a bad idea. So, why do we go against all logic and do it anyway?
Why We Love Breakup Sex - Love Withdrawals
The term ‘love withdrawals’ refers to the physical and emotional symptoms that can occur when a person is separated from someone they love. This can happen after a breakup, or it can happen when a person is unable to see or be with the person they love for an extended period of time.
The symptoms of love withdrawals can vary from person to person, but they can include physical symptoms such as changes in appetite, difficulty in sleeping, depression, anxiety, and feelings of loneliness and isolation. Essentially, love withdrawals make dealing with a breakup feel like a bad case of the flu, but with more tears and less chicken soup.
The cause of love withdrawals is not fully understood, but it is thought to be related to changes in the levels of hormones and neurotransmitters in the body. When you're in love, your body pumps you full of all kinds of feel-good chemicals. When the relationship ends, or when we are unable to see our partner, the levels of these hormones can drop, leading to withdrawal symptoms.
So why do we want breakup sex? Because love withdrawals are like being addicted to a drug. We’re basically little love junkies looking for a fix.
How To Avoid Giving in To Breakup Sex?
Honestly, I thought of 100 different ways to say this, but Dua Lipa has already put together the perfect 3 step program for us:
“One: Don't pick up the phone
You know he's only callin' 'cause he's drunk and alone
Two: Don't let him in
You'll have to kick him out again
Three: Don't be his friend
You know you're gonna wake up in his bed in the morning
And if you're under him, you ain't gettin' over him”
If you still find yourself sending ‘You up?’ messages at 3 am, it may be a good idea to check out a full body massager like Palm instead ;) MyMuse has got your back!
Okay but, if you're still asking the question, ‘should I indulge in breakup sex?’. That’s the wrong question. Ask yourself, ‘would I offer a drink to a recovering alcoholic?’.
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